Sire! Sire!
What?!?
Goblins Sire! Goblins have been spotted in the Haunted Hills and they're heading this way!!!
Fool, how many times have I told you not to bring that damned hog in here? Besides, aren't the goblins in those hills the undead's problem?
Apologies sire, but…wait, what? No, umm…well maybe, but…well, they're still heading this way!
…sigh… Very well, muster the army for battle.
We...we don't really have an army sire…
What? What happened to the levy increases I ordered?!?
No crowns for it…you spent the treasury on the purchase…umm, I mean to arrange passage for your new concubines from Wurtbad. Prior to last winter…remember?
Ah yes. They were new then weren't they? T'was a rather good investment that was, bout time again for me to send for some more. They don't last long out here do they? Shame the local crop of them is so poor, disgusting peasants. No matter for right now though, will just make a note…for later…there. Now, back to this goblin concern of yours. We still have our old regiments…don't we? I know we have somebody up on the walls…
Regiments? Well some of them...yes, not too many though. Still no cavalry, nor any hand gunners, or cannon…
Calm down fool, it's only goblins we're talking about. Probably half dead ones too knowing those hills. Speaking of, what of the Black Guard? Have they returned from their annual expedition? What was it, to rebury the dead of Sylvania, again? If only they did it right the first time. I do wonder why they didn't take care of the bloody goblins while they were already out there?
Yes they're back. Well, most of them anyways…some didn't survive. Oh and they went to the south as I recall sire…the goblins are coming from the north.
Then we'd best point them in the proper direction this time! Tell them to muster immediately with uh…well, whomever else we have to fight. Oh, and send some of those woodsmen out to find that damned heathen wizard!
What if he doesn't want to come this time? He was rather hostile the last time you sent for him.
Bah, tell him that the goblins are eating all the nuts and berries in his beloved forest, and they're pissing in his creeks too! That ought to roust him out of his cave.
Um…yes, very good sire. I'll have the woodsmen do that…
What about that damned witch hunter? Where'd he go off to?
Umm…I believe that he's still burning those halfings at the stake…the ones from the caravan that arrived last week. Remember? Last I heard he planned to keep doing so till they named all of the witches that they're hiding.
He's cooking halflings? The irony. Tell me, are those little trouble makers actually harboring a witch?
It's doubtful sire.
hmm…well despite the merit of his current endeavor, inform him that there are goblins coming and they have some shamans amongst their number, that ought to catch his fancy. Oh, and keep our wizard friend out of his sight, or at least till that fanatic is knee deep in goblins.
Yes sire…but…
But what?
But what if the goblins don't have any shamans?
So what if they don't? Neither do the halfings. They're all the same to a Witch Hunter anyways, just different colors.
Um, right. Shall I call a war council for you sire?
No, no…I was just on my way to the tavern anyways, this bottle's empty. Besides I know the regimental sergeants, if we have any of worth left, will already be there. Now you go on and do as I've ordered and get your damned hog out of here! Or else I'll have my cook put it on a spit for tonight's feast!
Yes sire! Right away sire!!
As you've by now realized, Murl's goblins have decided to invade Stirland this coming Saturday. It will be his first 8th ed WHFB game, and my first in a long, long time, as well as my first ever fielding The Empire. As you can surmise, I have a character heavy, infantry light force, that is decidedly lacking in the cavalry, artillery, ranged combat areas. No matter, it ought to give us an idea of whether or not we actually want to pursue this change from the norm any further or not.
I guess I have a reason to bring the graveyard now.
ReplyDeleteHeh, WHFB battlefields tend to use the 'God's Soccer field' setup, but sure why not.
ReplyDeleteOoh, and you'll have to use the new forests, too, just so they can eat things (maybe).
ReplyDeleteAlso, there may be a "Bad-Ass Super-Incredible Large Instrument of Supreme Killing" bombarding you from the next table. :D
Doubt we'll be using the mystery terrain effects as all of the other rules will be enough to tackle. That said, feel free to use them for your game, as those rules are all in the back of the 40k rulebook too.
ReplyDelete(oh, and I do think we'll well out of range of any of your big guns which are located in Nuln).
Not much love for Hoth.
ReplyDeleteMuch love for Fanghorn.
Deny screech x amount of craters.
I have no love for whatever those turd-things are supposed to be either... BTW I will not be there Saturday as I will be at Warfrog's feeding bugs or killing space elves....
ReplyDeleteFinally! I can't wait to read about a Fantasy game here.
ReplyDeletelol, I'll probably post a stumble-thru bat. rep. on Monday.
ReplyDeleteIf you can find some crew, I have a BFSB canon that I can mail you. Heck, dwarfs are part of the empire, so you can probably just use the crew that comes with it. You want me to send it to you?
ReplyDeleteYeah sure! Free bees are always welcome (and my stirlanders aren't above handouts!).
ReplyDelete