Friday, February 15, 2013

Ha ha! Suckers...

...I'll bet you spent a fortune on jewelery didn't you?

lol, for those in other countries who don't know, yesterday was Valentine's day. The holiday in which we celebrate our love, devotion etc., to our significant others. However in truth, it (like most holidays in America) is really a celebration of capitalism and a MASSIVE multimedia marketing blitz that has long since destroyed whatever the actual cause for this holiday was years ago...

That media blitz insists that if we don't spend a fortune on triple-priced roses (for this one day only), and a dinner in a fancy restaurant (with rushed and mediocre service as the servers don't want to be working on this, of all holidays),  lots of chocolate samplers in the cliched heart shaped boxes, and of course diamond studded jewelry of all descriptions, we're the of scum of the earth.

Yes, we're heartless bastards whom care nothing for the women in our lives. Guys get presents too, but in truth, the average guy looks at Valentine's day thru the distorted lens of 'how much do I have to spend to get laid this time?' Yes, even you hopeless romantics out there ultimately think that as well, don't lie. Love & devotion is best expressed on the day its not all but required by law which is to say, the other 364 of them, but I digress...

Basically its all about the women and making them feel special, because (obviously) we only care about ourselves for other 364 days of the year...right.  Why is it that March 20th doesn't have the same marketing blitz and hype? I guess that if you have to pay for your steak AND the BJ, then its really not that much of a holiday now is it? But seriously, many guys have never heard of it, WTF?

 Worse yet, what if you're single? Then Valentine's Day is the most miserable fucking excuse for a fucking holiday that was ever fucking conceived. It's like the world is pointing at you and saying: 'LOSER!' With the sole exception of this year, that's always been my thoughts on Valentine's day.

So, for once I found myself in the oh so rare situation of having to buy presents for Valentine's day.

Card: check
Candy: check (and no, not the chocolate cliche)
Something Expensive: umm...

Our relationship is a bit new to be dropping a huge chunk of change on a gift. Indeed, it was liable to be more awkward than appreciated. So, I pondered: 'what do most women want on that front? Something small, expensive and gold.'

Yikes!

Luckily for me, my girl finds my mini-gaming interesting, and nothing gets that 'aww...' feeling like making a present yourself, right? Plus, while I don't know what the current price of an ounce of gold is, all of us gamers know that nothing, and I mean NOTHING rises in price faster than a Games Workshop miniature! Plus, she has for years used the online name of Blonde Wolf (or some variation thereof). So checking to see if all the parameters were covered:

Small: check
Expensive: Check
Gold: Check (well sorta)


...and so there we have it, I made her a Blonde Wolf. She loved it! Best of all, what I (or rather 'we') did afterwards was just as good, if not better (yes, yes I'll go with 'better' as the in-between-sex, 40k-related pillow talk is such a rare thing in the general sense) than those who spent a fortune after falling for the slogan of 'Every kiss begins with Kay...'

;-p


17 comments:

Hive Angel said...

I give this post a huge wopping ...

"FUCK YEAH"

Score on the miniature idea.

rogue.trader.voril said...

Biggest DOUCHE. Ever.

Anonymous said...

Actually it as a MAJOR SCORE on a few levels!! I mean 40K pillow talk is always stimulating.*wicked grins*

And yes, while it maybe true that every kiss begins with kay... better things start with blo... well... blond wolf. :o

Thanks again for the kickass mini babe (and mmmmm, well everything else) I <3 <3 <3 it!!

Da Masta Cheef said...

You're welcome Babe!!!

{:-D

For that reply alone I'm sure I can expect much hate at the game shop this weekend...

...snicker...

rogue.trader.voril said...

We have all voted. You're uninvited Saturday, :P

Da Masta Cheef said...

lol, no doubt!

Kushial said...

Meh, I'm single so I get off cheap this holiday so no hate from me.

Da Masta Cheef said...

Speaking of you, I'm planning on fielding the ENTIRE Eleet Grot Mountin Divishun Saturday...

Kushial said...

So one grot per every three marines?

Hive Angel said...

Kushial,

I need to get your email one day. Would it be tough to bring your Tyranids next time so I can take a look at your inventory?

Da Masta Cheef said...

Uhh, reverse those numbers Kushial.

Hive Angel said...

Fearful Masta Cheef is fearful.

Kushial said...

I was doing the entire grot div vs entire marine legion. Lol. And I'll see about packing the nids if not tomorrow then the next time I make it up.

neverness said...

This sounds like a sick match up tomorrow!

...I saw the 'blonde wolf' mini earlier and was like "oh no, not another Space Wolf player!" LOL. It wouid be unique to see all blonde hair/pelt/tail SW army though.

Have you got to play a game with you yet?

Da Masta Cheef said...

Rob walked her thru the game we played as he's much better at explaining the rules than I am, that's it though.

lol, Kushial! Then yes you're right, it is a 3:1 ratio in your favor.

Rifkind Wolfwalker said...

Not to mention Neverness... blondes can be exceptionally good with manipulation tactics, especially in large numbers! HA!

And Da Masta Cheef I would def be up for a game. (*hint hint* ;) I mean who better than you to pop my 40K cherry, babe?) Not that watching didn't teach me quite abit (luckily the basics are still Warhammer & those rules I know!)... and I'd like to watch more as well.

Da Masta Cheef said...

I'm sure I can arrange that!