Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Digitally remasterd in FAILcast...


Recently my girlfriend has shown some interest in my mini gaming, and wanted to 'geek out' with my miniatures. Not knowing to much about 40k (she's more familiar with Warhammer Fantasy Role Play) aside from what she's read on GW's website, this and Neverness' blogs, Wikipedia and Lexicanum. So, the other night I pulled out all of my minis, kinda giving her an vague and rambling overview of my collection, and especially the design aesthetics. For example putting my Beastman IG next to my Loyalist IG, which look quite different, yet are exactly the same rules wise.

Going thru everything I came to the Inquisition layer at the bottom of one case. I call it the Inquisition layer, as it contains the remnants of my once vast array of Inquisitors and their allied contingents. Most are gone due to the fact that Matt Ward's OMG THIS WILL BE SO AWESOME!!!!! writing style makes me feel like a dirty cheeseball every time I consider using them. Fucker. Anyways, the only reason i still have any of them, is because Inquisitor Coteaz allows my beloved Imperial Forestry Service guys to be a troops choice.

'Grassy Knoll' is on Coteaz' left, and 'Ranger Smith' his on his right.

This is a FAILcast model, and of the three of those that I've bought, he and my Empire Captain, were relatively free of defect. Whereas my old Emperor's Champion-turned-Arkos the Faithless was fucked up, and later sold off. 

Now, I've only purchased one White Dwarf magazine since it was updated to the new format, that one being the first 'new' one. In that issue was the CSM release, and there was page after page of 'digitally remastered in 'high quality' Finecast previews of all sorts of the old CSM sculpts. GW literally emptied a thesaurus describing how wonderful these new models were now that they're in finecast (which is consequently sooo much cheaper for them to make and sooo much more expensive for us to buy).

Are you Fucking kidding me???
So why all this rambling? Well, going back to Coteaz, I pulled him out of the case above, and due to the exceptionally heavy weight of this miniature, and the exceptionally "high quality" of the finecast resin, his fucking hammer handle warped around his body in the fucking GW case!!! Not even FW resin parts that are so thin as to be translucent before priming do this!

What. The. Fuck. GW???

Pay attention Screech, I know you were thrilled with the detail of all of those FAILcast Thousand Sons conversion kits last week. You'd best store them vertically in a deep tray, or else they'll be screwed in the long run!

Does anybody know if Testor's matte varnish with hold up while it is immersed in hot water in an attempt to bend the damned thing back?  Personally I'm of the mind to just mail GW the damned thing with a note to have whomever is in charge of the FAILcost production to put it on their desk, so as to remind them of the 'exceptional quality' that they're providing us! Then I'll just convert a 'counts as' Coteaz out of PLASTIC! Makes me wonder if they'll just convert 40k into one of those pre-painted plastic clicky shit games. Seems they're using the same high quality material as those games have.

As such (and if you're reading this GW, pay attention) I will never ever, buy ANYTHING made of this crap ever again! Even if its fine when you get it, the necessary act of storing it will still fuck it up!


Hive Angel said...

Since my mind is warped I'll say he looks like he a case of the "Banana Dong". Still getting a case of the bendies in while in the case is not amusing at all.

sonsoftaurus said...

Oh man. Sorry to hear that. Don't know how the stuff would hold up, maybe give it another sealer coat and try the hot salt method instead.

The more I see about finecast stuff, the more I want to avoid it. Sad. Finecast, horrible codex writing, massive white dwarf delays...GW really needs to work on getting things right the first time. I have rarely had any issues with their plastic kits; they need to take whoever is in charge there and have them spread the word through the rest of the company.

Da Masta Cheef said...

What is the hot salt method? Heating salt in a microwave, immersing the mini in it to do essentially the same thing?

Considering the detail quality of the single model plastic kits, like the new CSM champion, it boggles the mind that they still insist on finecast, which is inferior in all respects.

pchappel said...

Wow, that is horrible, even given it was a "good" casting never thought the "finecast" would just be that horrible. I do wonder if they have not altered their "finecast" resin a few times... I have 2 things in this materiel and never plan another purchase of it. Pedro Cantor seems fine, the resin was pretty firm, more like FW/my own stuff ( I used to do a lot of casting)... Then I bought the "Sternguard Weapon Pack" and that stuff was just like the really bad plastic used in the Mageknight minis... Sorry to Dave over at the Gopher (FLGS), but pretty much seems to be the local consensus at least that plastic is great, metal fine, but that is about it...

Hive Angel said...

Actually if hot salt is similar to hot sand you might be able to ask an eyeglass repair center to try to heat it up. Their hot sand helps bend glasses frames without any damage. If you tip the person something as a good gesture they probably won't mind.

sonsoftaurus said...

re: hot salt - Haven't done it myself yet, just heard about it.

Da Masta Cheef said...

@pchappel: Yup, this stuff is the pits. I sent more or less a carbon copy rant to GW, however I'm not expecting much, if anything to come of it. They probably get dozens of emails like this a day. Gopher Dave you say? Do me a favor & say hi to Lo for me next time you're there!

@ Hive Angel & SoT: hmm, interesting, will check out that link & see. The problem is, even if I fix it, it'll just happen again...

neverness said...


I would have been SO pissed off if that happened to me!

I have also heard of accounts of Finecast becoming exceptionally brittle if exposed to heat for too long (like, left in a case in your car all day long on a summer day).

Da Masta Cheef said...

Its absolutely infuriating to be honest, especially as its already painted, and was properly stored.

Anonymous said...

The only model I've got done in fine cast is a tech marine. He came in good shape but I've had to reconnect one of his pack's arms a couple of times now due to breaking off

rogue.trader.voril said...

First off, the comment about your girlfriend came over and you whipped you your miniature almost had me spitting cereal out of my nose. Thanks.

Second, I have been pitching a bitch fit about Fuckcast for over a year for the same reason. My incubi weapons would warp like that. I wouldn't mind the hybrids like they use to do in metal and plastic... and basically that's what I did. I put metal weapons on Fuckcast bodies. Not one problem since.

Latest rumor is Failcrap is only temporary. At some point everything will be plastic.

Da Masta Cheef said...

First: lol!

Second: I got a plastic GK Nemesis force stave bit ordered & will cut off the warped handle and pin that in its place.

Third: I heard that rumor as well. I think the FAILshit was intended as permanent, but the overwhelmingly negative response to it for reasons listed here, have made it 'temporary'. The damage is already done though, they should have waited and gone straight to all plastic.