Monday, August 29, 2011

Orks! In! Spaaaaaaaaace!!!

(use the narrator's voice from the Muppet Show's 'Pigs in Spaaaace!' segment)


I'm still kinda in the 'I want to paint, but don't feel like painting' funk. Dunno why, or when it'll end. Its kinda odd really as even when burnt out I've never had any loss in the urge to paint minis.


Anyways, I decided to drag out my Ork BFG fleet yesterday and paint some ships up. BFG ships are quite easy to paint as they're more or less a case of almost all dry brushing, and Ork ships make it even easier as they really don't need to look 'pretty'. So letting my attention to detail pretty much slack off, I managed to paint the following:

Da Red Orktober! This is one of my Kill Kroozers. Its kinda sad that there is such a limited number of Ork kroozer types. but such is GW's love of its specialist games division. Having an over-abundance of karriers, all of my various kroozers (konvershuns included) are all now counted as just Kill Kroozers.

A Brute Ram ship skwadrun. These have always been little psychological warfare weapons of terror, yet have never really accomplished anything aside from said terror on the table top. However after our last game (whenever that was) I realized that I had misread the LD checks for ramming and that that was the cause of their continued failure (which shall hopefully be corrected in their future).

And lastly a pair of Savage Gunships, which are now equipped with 'Bloo Toof Teknology!' Despite their increased speed over other escort/kroozer types, these two tend to hang back till da fleet gets 'stuck in'. At which point they charge in and (hopefully) cripple something that was more concerned with the looming Kroozers and/or battleship.

At this point, all that my Ork fleet has left to be painted is my Supa Karrier (battleship) Da Orktown, and a terror ship turned kill krooozer named Da Orkinawa.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I have minions!


I missed out on our group's last Dark Heresy night (nor did I make any quantifiable painting progress) as I was getting ready to make a weekend run to South Carolina. However after my Character Boris' success in tidying up our team's mission, and getting everyone back on board our ship in orbit for the long return trip home, we're now going to use our original DH characters for a bit. Which is fine, as playing the role of a sociopathic, megalomaniacle, and quite deluded madman can be a bit tiring and a break was needed for me.

My original character Yoseph was never intended (by me) to survive his first adventure as he was a more or less the 2 dimensional training wheels type. A simple 'point & shoot' kind of guy, while I learned the game. He did survive however, and as our new mission is on a hive world, Yoseph has been put in charge! (grins maniacally). Besides the players of our prior team leaders are either burnt out or (in the latter case) incompetent (whether or not I'll be any better remains to be seen).

In talking with our token guardsman the other night, I commented that with me in charge, their lives were forfeit! Assets to be exploited and discarded at my leisure. He took offense to his new reality, so he shall be the first to go!

"Now get up there in front and take that bullet for me bitch!"

Sigh, sorry but that would be Boris talking there actually (were he ever officially put in charge). When compared to Boris, Yoseph is a rather nice guy (nice for a scum anyways).

Previously I had used one of the plastic Orlock juve models with an added shotgun on his back. However with 6 months back pay to spend, as well as money from selling off his old & scavenged gear (just where or when he acquired a vox-caster is beyond my recollection), I reequipped Yoseph and switched to the (oh so appropriate) Necromundan scum model pictured @ left & above. My rolls for finding items were all pretty much good (one roll for each item barring his pistols which required the used of my 'daily reroll'). The now reequipped Yoseph has a Flak coat, two hand cannons with silencers (so they're not quite the bolt pistols on the mini, but they still pack quite a punch), plenty of ammo, his trusty ol' knife, a multi-key (every scum should have one) and the requisite flask of Rotgut booze.

I'm not really sure as to what's in store for inquisitorial team Gamma this coming Friday, however I can assure all of you that Yoseph will expend as many of the other team member's lives as is necessary to accomplish his mission!

Thought for the day: The ends justify the means.

Friday, August 19, 2011

So who's winning exactly?


Well this week the enemy fled before the mediocrity of the GK retinue horde and instead a day later I played another game of Mordhiem. Now, true to form, my rats won even though we had realized that in prior games that we were doing the rout tests wrong which would have sent my rodents fleeing for their lives (taking them once reduced to 25%, not as soon as we suffered 25% casualties). Such is the way of learning to play a game. Anyways we played scenario #8 (I believe) out of the rule book in which there are no routs tests unless taken voluntarily.

So, the Skaven won, right?

I'm not too sure on that. In the aftermath of the game where we roll for injuries, income, etc., all of the accursed Reiklanders recovered without any injury (though they've amassed a few bitter enmities by this point). Meanwhile I once again had a giant rat and Verminkin die (thus maintaining my average).

What the hell?!?

Instead of spending my gold on new/cool stuff for the warband, it almost all goes towards filling the continuously opening holes in the ranks. The Skaven's lack of resilience apparently extends beyond just games of WHFB. To further complicate things, the rat below rolled 'The lad's got talent.' on the henchmen advances chart. At that point I had more heroes than henchmen!
The henchmen group he came from were equipped with clubs & shields (and almost identical paint jobs). After pondering for a moment on how to differentiate the henchman from the hero, i decided to just hire a new henchman equipping him like the old henchman, and to then just buy a sword for the newly elevated 'Snitch Blade'. Of course he came out of the as yet unpainted & unused slaves with swords & shields pile. However his hunched back & reversed blade set him apart enough not have him look like the other sword bearing henchmen models when they eventually hit the table (their swords are held blade first as is normal).

In any case, my Mordheim record up to this point is three pyrrhic victories and counting...

Monday, August 15, 2011

Assassin & Paladin


In looking throught the new GK codex, I saw that the Eversor assassin's gun was no longer a combi-weapon but rather just an 'uber' bolt pistol. For years I had been using my old 'original' assassin conversion as the aptly named 'Obsolete Assassin'. He was an elite slot Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor with rosarius, bolter-stake crossbow, frag & Krak, and a power weapon, and all for a mere 68pts. He never accomplished too much other than just running around, looking cool, and ganking the occasional psyker. However two quick snips of the 'crossbow' bits on his gun, a little bit of codex gray to cover the bare plastic, and he is now returned to full assassin status as an Eversor! :-D

This evening my 'wound allocation circus' will get its battlefield debut against....something. Hopefully another fluff ball list. Though I'm already have visions of a gun line IG list that will obliterate me without ever even trying to move forward. Nonetheless, I finished painting up my paladin 'Matt Fucking Ward' last night and am rather pleased with him (well, the mini, not the actual guy).
The Chapterhouse Exorcist shoulder pad fit on nicely, and GW's sculptors really did an excellent job of giving it a really dynamic pose (though that was more a luck of the draw sort of thing for me as I ordered this lone mini from ebay). The base looked too plain to just flock (a common issue with the 40mm bases) so I trimmed down a Slaaneshi (I believe) icon to fit. All I need now is the regular Exorcist Squad and then (barring the 'borrowed' Aurora vehicles I'll have an almost entirely painted army.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

The wound allocation circus


Well, I've been working on trying to turn all of my inquisitorial 'circus side shows' into a viable army (without having to buy any stupid monkey models). I've also had to raid the Aurora chapter vehicle pool & added in a handful of GK just for good measure. Can I field it? Yes, once I get Coteaz (or 'Cotex' as Murl has dubbed him) and the purgation squad. Will it work? Probably not.

Locally for opposing forces I have the following to choose from: Tryanid psyker/MC spam, completely immobile 'mechanized' IG, Plague marines, at least a half dozen Space Wolf armies, and a random allotment of everything else.

Of course there will be no sympathy for me as I'll be using a codex that often makes me feel I need a shower after perusing its pages. Matt Ward's wish-listing in print doesn't strike me or most of 'teh interwebz' as balanced. 5 points for a master-crafted upgrade? Only 5 for psybolt ammo? Makes sense when a regular SM rifleman is only 5 points cheaper right? Combat servitors can swap their servo arms for a heavy bolter for free, really? isn't that a 15-20 point upgrade in the IG & SM codexes?


Aside from the paladins (and only as I saw they come in units of 1) & purgation squad (I needed a GK devastator unit of some sort) & vehicles. I haven't even read the rules/fluff for the other GK units (or even the majority of the fluff in the whole book).

I don't think I've felt this much distaste for a codex since the current CSM codex was released (only just for entirely different reasons this time around). And yet, last night when I pulled all of my various Inquisitors & retinues out, I couldn't help but smile with affection for the whole mob of them. So, in trying to make heads or tails of what I had, I came up with the following list:

The Wound Allocation Circus: 1498 Points


Inquisitor Coteaz

Ordo Malleus Inquisitor Longshot

Hell Rifle, (2) Servo Skulls


(the no longer obsolete and now) Eversor Assassin

Matt Fucking Ward! (Paladin)

Master-Fucking-Crafted Nemesis Force Halberd


The Imperial Forestry Service:

(5) Acolytes w/ Autoguns (Bolters), (1) Acolyte w/Stormbolter

Forestry Service Rhino

Dozer Blade, Extra Armor

Interrogator Flintlock’s Horde:

(1) Acolyte w/Plasma Pistol, Carapace Armor

(6) Acolytes w/Hot-shot lasguns & Carapace Armor

(1) Acolyte w/Hot Shot Lasgun, Power Armor

(1) Banisher, (1) Death Cult Assassin

Flintlock’s Chimera

Searchlight, Extra Armor

Interrogator Franklin’s Horde:

(1) Acolyte w/Power Sword, Carapace Armor

(2) Acolytes w/Nothing (not even clothes!)

(1) Acolyte w/Carapace Armor, Flamer

(1) Banisher w/Evicerator, (1) Crusader

(1) Acolyte w/Carapace Armor

(1) Nid-Slayer (Death Cult Assassin)

(1) Acolyte w/Boltgun & Carapace Armor

Mechanicum Detachment:

(3) Gun Servitors w/Heavy Bolters, (3) Combat Servitors

(1) Acolyte w/Power Axe, Carapace Armor
(1) Acolyte w/Power Axe, Power Armor, Bolter

Heavy Support:

(5) Purgation Squad

(4) Psycannons

Landraider Crusader

Extra Armor, Psybolt Ammo, True Silver Armor


(2) Twin-Linked Autocannons, Extra Armor, Psybolt Ammo

I still have a dozen or more unused retinue models, but they would serve really no other purpose than throwing warm bodies onto the table top (and I think I've already done that enough here.


Monday, August 8, 2011



My Dark Heresy RPG group has been (somewhat) mulling the idea of trying out the Deathwatch RPG. Personally I'm more inclined towards Black Crusade as in DH, the 'good guy' characters that I tend to play would really fit better in Black Crusade. However I don't have that book (is it even out yet?) but I do have a PDF copy of Deathwatch. I haven't read too much of it however as i really don't like PDF books (rather I've more or less have just been skimming through the fluff & looking @ the pictures).

In the event that we do give it a try, the Storm Warden below will be used as my character (who has no stats whatsoever, yet already has a background, typical of me). Thus I present to you: Ozwald d'Kraken
The Stormwardens have a bit of a Scottish theme to them, so I gave him a claymore (which they can have in lieu of a combat blade) , and tried my hand at a tartan sash of sorts. It came out alright I think. he backpack reliquary holds the skulls of his former 10th co. sergeants.

Usually marines selected for service in the Deathwatch are grizzled veterans with decades if not centuries of combat experience. Not so with Ozwald, he's more of a hard luck case who's being sent to the Deathwatch with much trepidation...

+++++++++++++++DATE: 832945.M40

++++++++++++++++REF: SW/301259116

+++++++TRANSMITTED: Highcastle

+++++++++++++++++TO: Scintilla/Tricorn

++++++++++++SUBJECT: Warrior Tithe

+++++++++++LOCATION: Calixis Subsector

+++++SECURITY LEVEL: Vermillion

++++++++++++TOUGHT: The reward for suspicion is exile.



As chapter master I am honor bound to provide a tithe of volunteers to the Ordo Xenos at every opportunity. Many a Storm Warden has volunteered his service to the Deathwatch, and all have served with distinction. Indeed, transference to the Deathwatch holds great honor amongst our brethren. However it is with some trepidation that I send you our latest battle brother for service. His service is as brief as it has been exceptional (for a variety of reasons). However he is superstitiously considered ill omened, if not an outright harbinger of doom for his fellow squad mates. No squad in the 6th reserve will voluntarily accept his placement among their ranks. Rather than foment further dissention among the 6th , and/or any of our other reserve and battle companies chapter command has decided on exile as the best course of action. Unlike prior and current Storm Wardens fighting within the Deathwatch, brother d’Kraken (excluding his geneseed) is neither expected, nor permitted to return to us.

Lorgath Maclir

Storm Wardens Chapter Master


Battle Brother Ozwald d’Kraken

Storm Wardens • 6th Reserve Company

Formerly 4th Tactical Squad (4th Squad has been permanently stricken from 6th Co. ranks)


• Culled from Sacris trials 943.M40

• Initiate acceptance of implants: 100%

• Initiate acceptance of indoctrination: 100%

• Initiate accepted into 10th Company, 21st squad: 944.M40

• Initiate accepted into 6th Company 4th Squad: 945.M40

• Transfer to Deathwatch approved: 945.M40

• 10th Co. Deployments:


47 Kapella : Performance: Exemplary

41 Pry : Performance: Minimal*

Hulk Rise of Damnation (the purging thereof) : Performance: Exemplary


Avitohol : Performance: Nominal**

Overall performance: Acceptable

• 6th Co. Deployments:


Mara : Performance: Minimal***

* 21st Squad virtually wiped out by explosive decompression instigated by renegade suicide teams. Initiate d’Kraken was sole survivor, immediately removed from combat zone. After action, initiate d’Kraken reassigned to 34th Squad, 10th Co.

**34th Squad reduced by half after xenos ‘lifta-droppa’ hurled Landspeeder Storm 34/2 into a cliff side at speed. 34thsurvivors (Landspeeder Storm 34/1) attempted extraction of bodies/wreckage. 34th survivors caught in ambush with heavy losses & subsequently removed from warzone. Initiate D’Kraken & initiate Zarros only survivors. After Action reassigned 17th Squad, 10th Co.

***6th Company ‘training’ deployment to crush prison uprisings. 1st deployment of newly initiated 4th squad, Vet. Sgt. d’Aro in command. 4th squad drop pod suffers guidance malfunction resulting in missed landing zone, instead puncturing Maran ice pack. All but one pod door are unable to deploy due to ice/water, brothers d’Kraken & Zarros exit, attempt to assist remainder of squad within. Within pod, squad member (ID unknown) accidentally releases a door, opening out into to water below. Pod immediately flooded, added weight causes it to shift suddenly, knocking d’Kraken onto ice sheet and Zarros into pod. Pod sinks immediately to depth estimated at 7000m. 9 Battle brothers lost to pressure implosions of armor. Brother d’Kraken left as sole survivor. D’Kraken crossed (est.) 500km of ice pack & tundra to rejoin 6th company. 4th squad are the only casualties sustained during deployment. After action, due to 4th squad losses sustained on 1st deployment, 4th squad stricken permanently from ranks of 6th co., 11th squad formed to replace. 6th co. squads unwilling to accept brother d’Kraken, though investigation(s) show no fault of d’kraken led to initiates/battle brother’s deaths. Chapter decision: d’Kraken to be removed from chapter via induction into Deathwatch.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Never tell me the odds!


So, this past Monday, my Skaven warband the Clockwork Forage attacked some hapless Reiklanders in my first game of Mordheim in years. Starting out, we learned that I4 is great! And we also learned that we screwed up stuff all the way through as well. Hence no casualties were permanent, no experience was gained, etc.

However the highlight of the game (for me) was when The Great Horned Rat shined his favor upon the Forage as I rolled (8) 6's in a row! (while profanity was streaming from the other side of the table) I really only needed six of those as at that point the two Reiklanders that I had attacked were both out of action, I just kept rolling to see how many more sixes I could get. Afterwards I posted a query on facebook about the odds of that and the geeks responded quickly with a ‎1 in 1,679,616 chance! I wish I had that kind of luck on lottery tickets! (though I did win $4 this morning, after an expenditure of $2)

Speaking of numbers, we played Space Hulk again last night, and while the Blood Angels were wiped out again (victory was so close!) although they did manage a nice 3.7 kill ratio in their favor.

In other news. Murl had lent me his GK codex, forgot about that, couldn't find it, so he bought another, then remembered & told me to keep it (conveniently my birthday is right around the corner). He told me to try it rather than just sell off my horde of inquisitorial retinues, and after some pondering I'm going to give it a shot.

In truth, there is little in the codex that really appeals to me aside from all of the retinues (and maybe the Vindicare). However one chapter I've always liked, but felt could never be adequately fielded is the Exorcists*. Already having the HQ & Troops needs filled, I'm going to try & field the Exorcists in the Heavy Support role. For now I can borrow the primed rifleman dread & landraider crusader from the Aurora and to that I'm going to add a 5-man purgation squad with four psycannons. That will give me some good light anti-armor/MC support, and if all goes well with that I'll add in another in time. To help keep them from just looking like red & black GK, I ordered some Exorcist & devastator shoulder pads from Chapter house studios. Enough for one 5-man squad and one termie shoulder pad. I figure I'll field a single Paladin (all hail ebay) to act as a commander to the Exorcist's contingent (who will be named 'Matt Fucking Ward' in honor of his writing of the codex & his 4chan page, no warding stave though I don't think I could stomach a 2+/2++ model in my army).

*The Exorcist image was taken without permission from who probably stole it from GW who actually holds the copyright on it.

Monday, August 1, 2011



As you can see I managed to get my Wraithship painted up this weekend. It was a really snug fit on the sails, so I wasn't really able to test fit them beforehand, and as such I think I got the proper position reversed. Then again, after a google search of images, the sail position on these seem to be split in about an even 50/50 in regards as to which sail goes in front of which. With the larger sail in back, it looks as though the sail position can't be moved past the bridge structure. However seeing as how during the age of sail, the mon'keigh were able to vary the shape of their ship's sails (to some extent), I'm sure it would be of little difficulty for the Eldar.

I painted this in the colors of my Exodites and gave it the same name, Spinifex. The Spinifex (now a Ghost Ship) is the last surviving vessel from the fleet that carried the Exodite refugees from the home worlds to their new maiden world home so many millennia ago. The ship's original crew still maintain their ghostly vigil from within their spirit stones. Silently guarding the maiden world for eternity.

A profile view.